Stacey MacKinnon is laser-focused on her canvas during an evening art class in Montague, P.E.I. As she squiggles in eyebrows on a self-portrait, the University of Prince Edward Island professor said that while she’s always been creative, she’s not artistic.”The whole idea of ‘just let it flow’ — that hurts, that really hurts,” she jokes. “I need a plan, preferably colour-coded with stickers.”When she first saw an ad for this class — one designed specifically for burned out teachers and caregivers — she saw herself.”I found over the years, between responsibilities at home and trying to be everything I could be for my colleagues, for my students, that I got lost in the shuffle,” MacKinnon said.She signed up for the course and has had no regrets, saying she’s learned to enjoy the process of creating, instead of always racing to the outcome.At this art class for burned out caregivers at Creative Rebel Studios in Montague, P.E.I., participants are painting self-portraits. (Sarah Keaveney-Vos/CBC)”I’ve been so focused, as are so many people, on achieving, achieving, achieving… and achievement is good, but it has to be in balance with the process,” she said.”Without the joy of the process, it’s just another check box. And I don’t want to live a check box life. And I learned that here. And I learned that from Patrick.”That Patrick — is Patrick Guindon. He owns this art space, Creative Rebel Studio, and the class is his brainchild.The reason he can teach these lessons is because he’s been through such a dark period of burnout that it nearly broke him.”It kind of only makes sense to me to take all the stuff that I have figured out for myself and sort of package it so that other people don’t have to go through the depths that I had to,” Guindon said.’I can’t do this anymore’Before moving to P.E.I., Guindon was an elementary school teacher, working in the Cornwall area of Ontario. Always imaginative, he’d plot out scavenger hunts for math class, or use rainy days as an opportunity to take kids outside and use watercolours. “I poured so much of myself into it, and was a very progressive teacher,” he said.LISTEN | The classroom burned him out. Art brought him back:Atlantic Voice26:10The classroom burned him out. Art brought him backThe stress of teaching sent Patrick Guindon into a dark spiral. But he’s found a new path with his own art studio in Montague, P.E.I, where he uses what he learned to help others in their moments of burnout. CBC producer Sarah Keaveny-Vos has Patrick’s story in her documentary, The Art of Life.But other teachers, and the education system, weren’t as happy with his methods, he said. They instead put an emphasis on desk learning, drills and testing.Guindon began leaving at lunchtime to avoid the staff room, or he’d sit in his classroom with the lights off and door locked, trying to figure out other jobs. When the kids were in class, it was just as complicated.”It became really challenging because there was a shift in the kids and the behaviour and the home issues,” he said.”And I just felt like I was working really hard, like I wanted to save them all and I didn’t know how to do it.” I couldn’t process anything, my eyes couldn’t focus. My whole body felt like a tornado was in it.- Patrick GuindonIt escalated after one meeting about a suspended student that involved parents, administrators, resource staff and the Children’s Aid Society. Guindon felt he knew the student well after years of teaching them, but his expertise was sidelined.”I walked out of that meeting thinking, ‘I can’t do this anymore,'” he said. “There’s no point to me being here because nothing I say was just heard.”When he got home, Guindon said, he had his first panic attack.”I couldn’t process anything, my eyes couldn’t focus. My whole body felt like a tornado was in it.” Picking up the paintbrushGuindon asked for a stress leave, and was told to try therapy instead. He had always been an artist as well as a teacher, but he hadn’t felt creative amid his burnout. Guindon tries to inspire both artistic and life skills at Creative Rebel Studio. (Sarah Keaveny-Vos/CBC)His therapist ordered him back to his studio, telling him to paint off the palette without thinking about the results.He followed that advice, and as he continued to paint, he felt something inside him start to shift.”When I paint, I get lost in a good way. It’s almost like going for a walk through a trail you’ve never been on before… and just noticing the sun glinting off of a spider web,” Guindon said. That mindfulness gave way to peace.”It really is a therapy, because there is both the sensory input and output of it, as well as the processing that can happen in your mind and the meditative state.”
He burned out from teaching. Now he’s helping others through art
